I must be miserable ... down on my luck ... doom and gloom
... perhaps a bit crazy … have to be … I
work with mentally-ill prisoners ... that shits got to rub off on a person right? How else can I explain my leoprosy? Even received a text from someone who
used to be near to me but is still dear to me … saw me walking along the roadside, responded
to my text: "It looked like you were having a bad day so I didn't want to
bother you."
... hmmm ... what bothers me is silence ... as if I no
longer exist ... as if I never existed ... got to live under the Causeway with
my spots ... cast a way ... a castaway ... the employed homeless man … barged
into the home he once owned, crossed the threshold demanding his coffee … or so
someone filed ... among other things. Got to be crazy.
Lost Memory of Skin.
The Writer says: We just have to choose what to believe and
act accordingly, Kid ... your life will go on pretty much the same tomorrow as
yesterday. You can live out there on your houseboat like Huckleberry Finn on
his raft ... until something better comes along. (p.395)
The Shyster says: Everyone has a story that proclaims his/her
innocence. It's human nature. (p.409)
And in the end, Kid: ... if nothing is true then nothing is
real. Logic tells (you) that. And if nothing is real then nothing matters.
Which means you're free to believe whatever you want ... (p.410)
Funny ... or not ... (probably not) ... how I’ve scrounged
some quotes from the latest novel by Russell Banks, a novel dealing with the
lowest of the low. Lost Memory of Skin indeed. I've got my spots. Don't we all?
Unfortunately, I’m condemned to live with these spots under a causeway as if I
never ever existed. Sad. Truly truly sad. But I will plod forward. I will do
another twenty years in the presence of convicted felons … castaways … hoping …
at least for their sake … for reintegration.
*More to say regarding Lost Memory of Skin in another
post.
10 comments:
Jim, I keep waiting to here from Jodi so we can all get together. That was you walking? Shit if I had known that I would have veered my car over.
Seriously now that it's all done how often are you down in SCS? And if it's often WTF! We both have limited phone minutes so one of us has to blink and you KNOW I never get anywhere your new temporary digs...
LSG this Friday. You going? I guess one of us should let Jodi know because I can't find her on FB.
The quotation from page 409? Yup, that’s what we’re all like...every last one of us. So, then, what is innocence?
...never existed...invisible...or seemingly unapproachable?
I prefer to think of plodding as carrying on – albeit slowly.
Hey Jim,
You look like the lone guy in the fog when I gave my anti-poverty speech in Newmarket ON a fortnight ago.
Only a dozen po' boys showed up. But there was a brace of Canada geese, some honking at my speech with, I hoped, approval.
Hey Jim,
You look like the lone guy in the fog when I gave my anti-poverty speech in Newmarket ON a fornight ago.
Only a dozen po' boys showed up. But there was a brace of Canada geese, some honking at my speech with, I hoped, approval.
Here's hopin Ivan got honked at and not pooped on as it appears he may have been interupted.
On my raft have issues with codependency as I suspect is happening here. Thanks for sharing.
Gettin back to the raft...Huck
TWM, I've been doing alot of walking as of late. Still healing from a running injury. MW's been doing a bit of his own walking and for some reason someone wants to validate her existence in front of him, for whatever reasons I don't know. I give you a call soon so the old gang can get back together
Beth, you pose some valid questions. I've never been unapproachable; unfortunately, a few others have presented it that way.
Ivan, I've got my eye on those Canadian Geese in the sky.
yeah, I feel the world rubbing off on me more and more every day. I wonder if I'll ever get it off.
Have to agree with Huck. Issues of "codependency" just the tip of the iceberg here and I do mean iceberg!!!!!! Ivan, anything hit you from above or am I just reading double? Hang in there JR the metamorphis is making you a better person. Just ask your friends. :-} MW
Oh. man, Russell Banks is a harsh teacher. Hard apples of truth.
Working homeless man -- good one. Like the Greeks out on the sea after the Trojan War . . .
Art imitates life ... or vice versa ... doesn't matter when you're the odd man out ... the working stiff that can be blamed for everyting.
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